Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Adoption Update


Here’s the latest: Korea began allowing agencies to submit Emigration Permits (EPs) in March. Holt Korea has had to rearrange how they submit EPs. It is no longer chronological but instead, based on a variety of other factors. With these new submission guidelines, we have been passed over for families who will age out by July, are of Korean heritage, or have a Waiting child (WC) with special needs. I was hopeful that the last criteria would qualify us to be submitted soon, but three months later its painfully apparent that we don’t qualify for early, or even “on-time” submittal, even though our child was a Waiting Child and does have delays. They are obviously not serious enough to warrant special treatment.

I was pretty certain we’d be included in the group of EPs submitted for May, but were not. It was a huge disappointment to say the least. If they were submitting paperwork chronologically we should have been included, but with all the other people having priority we find ourselves still waiting.

Another thing making it tricky right now are all the new laws Korea is implementing in July. These are being “interpreted” by the court and these interpretations are altering who is submitted monthly. Holt Korea doesn’t want anyone to lose their adoption because of legal changes. (Understandable) Holt also doesn’t know how many EPs Korea will allow to be submitted each month so this also makes it hard.

So here we sit. We’ve been waiting 13 months since our referral. Our acceptance paperwork in Korea has now expired and we will have to update that. I expect that to cause further delay. In addition, July is when all the new laws take effect and I do not expect Korea to accept ANY EPs during this month due to being overwhelmed with the new adoption legalities and processes they will be implementing.

So, we just wait. Each month passes and the wait keeps growing. I don’t see any real end yet which is discouraging and every time I see a light at the end of the tunnel; it is literally snuffed out immediately. I hope I’m wrong about the delays, but based on the past year, I’d say its more likely I’m right. I could go on and on about how much the delay is costing (updating paperwork costs money) how many things we've been told "will happen" that have not happened, how airline tickets have skyrocketed in price, how the foster family becomes more and more attached and is more likely to want to adopt her, about how our baby has serious language delays, and the list just goes on and on and on and on.

I no longer contemplate all the many, many things this delays has done, is doing, and will do. They are quite numerous and I no longer care to think about them. It does no good. I don’t want to complain about them, or rehash them, or even sort them out. I just get up each day knowing I’m still waiting. I have no idea how long I’ll wait or even if we’ll get our baby. I’ve started praying this: “May my desire for this child not eclipse my desire for Your will.” I hold her with open hands and I know every day that God could and may take her away. If He does…then He does. He will sustain me regardless of what tomorrow holds.

2 comments:

  1. Oh, sweetie... I am so sorry the wait has gotten so long and so hard. We don't know each other but my Max came home 3 years ago and I have followed you blog for years. Praying with you and for you...
    Heather in NH

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  2. Wow. I'm not the type of person who writes on strangers' blogs, but your entry has touched me. You have a beautiful family and your faith has encouraged me.

    We are waiting to bring home our daughter also. We haven't been waiting nearly as long as you, but waiting none the less. I am of Korean heritage and we've gotten no word. Every night I scour the internet for any information that might shed some light on when we can bring her home. Our agency is estimating we will travel at the end of the year - that's if they have EP's left. I've surrendered to the fact, it's all part of God's plans. I'm just trying to figure out exactly how that plan is helping me! =)

    I pray your daughter will be home with you and your family soon.

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