Gyeongbokgung Palace

Long ago, these statues were placed out side of towns & villages to scare away evil spirits.

Korean school children. (Probably high school students)

Me as an ancient Korean soldier!

Touring Seoul

Today we went our guided tour of Seoul. We had our own tour guide who went by the name of "Helen."
Eating more Korean food for lunch.

Insadong Street was a great street full of shops and restaurants.

Burger King in Seoul.

On the City bus in Seoul

The YMCA in downtown Seoul

The citu bus ride.

A book store similar to Barnes & Noble (it even had a Starbucks)

A shopping Center in Seoul. It had 8 floors! It was great!

A note about video

Ok...I've taken a ton of video, but I can't seem to upload because we only have a dial-up internet connection in the room. I'm searching for a highspeed location, so when and if I find one, I'll get it uploaded so you can see it.

We met Addison!!!

This is the book of family photos we sent Addison. There were bite marks on the pages! (They were kisses!!) Evendentally she likes to bite things, especailly bottle nipples. Her foster mom keeps plenty of extra on hand because she is alwasy biting the ends off of them.
Addison and her foster mom

Addison liked my husband! (He usually make small children cry, so this was really good!) She went to both of us rather easily, but then eventually wanted her foster mom.

When she got fussy, her foster mom strapped her to her back and she calmed right down. The social worker said we need to get one of those carriers so we can carry her on our backs as well. She loved being on her foster mom's back! It was cute to watch her cuddle her head into her back.

Waving bye-bye.

She loves music and will clap her hands to it! Her Foster mom said she always takes her to church she will always clap during the music time. Her foster mom said said she was quite a celebrity at church!

Addison has a big personality! She is a complete ham. When we played peek-a-boo with her she would squeal and grin! She was also constantly moving. She never stopped wiggling the entire hour we were there! Her foster mom said she thinks Addison will be an opera singer because she is alwasy squealing and being very loud! She will fit right in with her three, loud older brothers!

Her foster mom is wonderful person. Mark and I gave her gifts but truly, I can't ever begin to repay her for all the love and prayers she has given our baby girl. How do thank a perosn who ahs loved you child so well, fo so long? I can't wait to get our baby on Thursday, but part of me is terribly sad to take her from her Korean family. It will definitely be bitter sweet.

Seeing Seoul!

Eating traditional Korean food with chop sticks!

Here was out whole meal. We had no idea what we were eating. (we knew there was seafood involved) We had no idea how to eat it, and there were no forks!!! The lady at the restaurant showed us how to combine all of it to make a meal, and what to use as dip. It was good lunch!

As you can see, we sat on the floor on a square, blue pillow and left our shoes at the door. My husband was a little big for that small table!!

A backstreet in Seoul. Yes, this was street, despite the fact that it looks like a bike path!

A plaza overlooking the city

We spent a good protion of the morning navigating our way through Seoul using the Subway system. We weren't very fast, but we never got lost! It was really fun exploring the city. We did find a great store called e-mart (like a small wal-mart) where I spent nearly $8 on deoderant. (YIKES!)

Here we are buying our Subway Tickets. This machine had an "English" option. When we bought our return tickets, the machines were strictly in Korean, and we were completely lost, but we were saved by a very nice Korean woman who spoke English and she helped us buy the right tickets so we could get back to the Hotel.

A LONG trip to Seoul!

Here were are in Seoul (27 hours after we began our trip!!!)

We stayed at a great Hotel. They upgraded us to a two-bedroom suit. Here is our little kitchen which also includes a small washer! It really nice!

One of our 2 bedrooms. (we also have two bathrooms!)

Our ride didn't show up to the airport and we didn't feel like paying $80 plus tip for a cab ride so we took the bus into Seoul. Here is our bus. It took us downtown and then we walked about 2-3 blocks to our Hotel. It only cost $16. We thought it was a bargain!

Our 2nd layover was in Tokyo Japan.

Out first layover was in Chicago.

This was us, befiore we traveled for 27 hours!!!

We meet Addison tomorrow at 1:00pm (11pm Central time)

...but for now...I'm going to bed.

First Baseball Tournament

Drew - ready for his first baseball tournament!!

So cute! love it!

(Too tough to smile.)

Addison’s latest doctor’s visit

We just received Addison's latest Well Baby check. Here's how she's doing!

• Weight: 23.1lbs: 90^th percentile for weight
  Height: 29.5 in: 63^rd percentile for height
  Plays peek-a-boo
  Plays pat-a-cake
  Waves bye-bye
  Plays ball
  Sits very well
  Walks holding onto furniture
  Takes one step!!!
  Rakes food with fingers
  Picks up food with forefinger and thumb
  Says mama, and ooma (food & mama)
  Repeats sounds & babbles
  

I can't wait to hold her and kiss her chubby cheeks!

Travel Call!!!!

We're going to Korea!!!!!!!!!!! I'm shaking and can't even think!!!!! I can't believe it. Its completely surreal!!!!!!

Addison has her Visa!!!

I called DC today and the nice lady told me that Holt had returned Addison's P3 packet and her Visa had been issued as of March 22nd!!!!! We are waiting on NOTHING else!!! She is ready to travel. All we need now is our travel call!!!! We are SO, SO close!!!!! I'm so excited!!!

Hilarious Blog

It's no secret that I love reading blogs. I don't watch TV to kill time, I read blogs. Its weird, but I love it. Today is a snowy and frigid day and I have no intentions of leaving my house so I decided to explore new blogs and much to my delight, I found one that is absolutely hilarious! It's entitled "Stuff Christians Like" (SCL) by Jonathon Acuff. It is a blog that laughs at, and addresses the bizarre and funny things about the Christian subculture, because if were all really honest here, we'd admit that we "Christians" have an unusual subculture and I'm so delighted someone is actually talking about it. (Admit it, we're weird, its ok, and even somewhat funny…so lets just take this with a grain of salt and laugh at ourselves a bit) Here is one post entitled "Understanding How Metrosexual Your Worship Leader Is…a handy guide." Here is a small excerpt:

1. Has a faux hawk hair style = +1

2. Has more product in his hair than your wife = +1

3. Has Rob Bell, black rimmed glasses = +1

4. They are not prescription, but just for effect = +2

5. Attends the Catalyst Conference = +3

6. Performs at the Catalyst Conference = +10

7. Owns Puma, Vans or Diesel sneakers = +2 per each pair

8. Wears jeans on stage = +1

9. Wears designer jeans on stage = +2

10. Wears Wrangler or Rustler jeans on stage = -3

11. Has a goatee = +2

12. Wears one of those Castro revolution looking hats = +2

13. Drinks coffee on stage = +1

14. Drinks some kind of coffee you did not know existed = +2

15. Brings a French Press on stage and makes his own coffee during service = +5

16. Has a handlebar mustache = -3

17. Good at Frisbee but hates getting all "sweaty" = +1

18. Has a haircut that covers one of his eyes while singing = +1

19. Owns a white belt = +2

20. Owns suspenders = -3

21. Wears a scarf with a t-shirt = +1

22. Wears a winter knit hat even in the summer = +2

Ok, so if you're not laughing yet, you should be, or you need more coffee! To see the entire 50 points…click here…and enjoy!

Crushed, yet drawn…

Christians are people who always have hope. God never leaves his children alone and we will never find ourselves beyond his grip, out of his divine control and hopeless. But what does this look like? I've always had the misconception that this somehow meant you could always find some morsel of happiness regardless of the circumstance; that no matter how bad, there was always something to smile about. This may be true, certainly God has poured out many undeserved blessings upon his children, but there are times that the road is hard; and God allows it to be hard and finding a smile is cliché, shallow, and meaningless. There are times that tears and frustration overwhelm you and the hope you know is there is just a faint flicker in the distance; It's not that you're hopeless, it's just hard to grasp it.

There are those times you feel like God is crushing you, and yet He is the only One who understands you; the only One who can speak any amount of tangible comfort into your soul through the pages of His word. It's an odd dichotomy; to feel crushed and yet drawn all at once. I don't know if that's normal; its certainly nothing I hear about in the shallow, cliché "Christianity" I often see used to draw crowds, sell books, or increase giving. No, this is completely different. It's a difficult thing. It consumes you, it isolates you, it breaks you, but in that place you hear the words of your Saviour saying, "The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and contrite heart O God, you will not despise." He will not despise my brokenness. That is the sacrifice he wants. He leads all of His children down that path; at different times, through different methods.

The Bible has countless examples of this; The woman who suffered for 12 years with an illness that caused bleeding, spent all her money on doctors and yet was worse after the treatments than before; God brought her to a place of brokenness before she met Jesus who instantly healed her. (Mark 5:15-34) Or take for example Jarius' 12 year old daughter who became gravely ill, and even died before Jesus went His home and raised her form the dead. (Luke 8:49-56) Twelve years of futile, expensive medical treatments, watching your daughter fall gravely ill and die; do we really believe these individuals didn't crumble emotionally; Of course they did, and God says that broken spirit is what he wants. He wants our brokenness.

Read the words of David in Psalm 88, "You have put me in the lowest pit, in dark places, in the depths. Your wrath has rested on me and you have afflicted me with all your waves." David is broken, he is crying out. And this Psalm doesn't end in rejoicing. It ends with David lamenting that God has removed his "lover, friends, and acquaintances." He is alone, he is crushed, and God hears him. God doesn't look at Him and say, "Don't feel that way", or "Smile because I love you." God doesn't do that to his children. He instead, picks us up, holds us in his hands, and listens to us cry. He is the source of all good, and although I don't understand His ways, I do know that in His grip is the only place where true comfort is found, near His side is the only place I find the any consolation that calms my soul, and in his grip I will eventually find hope even if I can't see it today.
"Though He slay me, I will trust Him." Job 13:15

ETA:

*Here are the newest timeframes.

(Disclaimer: This is purely speculation, as we know from vast experience, this can and most likely will change)

• Class B waiver will arrive at the end of this week. (3/19)


• Travel Call; earliest would be the end of the next week (3/26)...could be longer.


• Acutally traveling: Holt is backlogged so we will probably have to wait 7-10 days before we can travel. (4/5)

God is Good

"God is the source of all good and the standard by which good is measured. We may not like what God does, but we are in no position to accuse Him of wrongdoing. Every breath He gives us - we who deserve immediate and eternal death - is a gift."

From the book If God is Good, by Randy Alcorn, p. 144

A Psalm…

Save me O God,

For the waters have threatened my life.
I have sunk in deep mire, and there is no foothold;
I have come into deep waters, and a flood overflows me.
I am weary with my crying; my throat is parched;
My eyes fail while I wait for my God.
-Psalm 63:1-3

Yet Another Delay...

Today while I was getting lunch Holt called. I thought it was our Travel call, but no. Our baby needs a “class B waiver” because she has a seizure disorder. She won’t be issued a US Visa without this waiver being signed, notarized, and returned to Korea. This was the only possible thing that could delay us at this point, and yes, we hit it. Which at this point in our journey shouldn’t’ surprise me, because after all, that is just par for the course for us. I’ll be frank…I’m done. I have no emotional stamina left. If God wants us to have this baby I really wish he’d give her to us, and if not, then take her…but I can’t keep doing this anymore. I need this to end, becasue I've got nothing left.

Nothing.

"She is Beautiful"

I call the DC Visa Center this morning to see if Addison had made her Embassy Appearance. I waited on hold for 15 minutes, and then finally a nice lady answered. She said, “Well, the agency hasn’t returned her P3 packet yet, but I do see her picture and it says she had her embassy appointment March 4th." And then she said, “She is beautiful.” I really didn’t expect to hear any news today at all, so I’m very surprised, and very happy for the good news. YEAH.

Thoughts on Embryo Adoption

I came across this very intersting post by Dr. Russell D. Moore, the author of Adopted for Life - a very good book by the way. In it, he was exploring the issue of adopting frozen embryos that were "left over" from in vitro fertilization. (IVF) His comments were insightful and thought provoking. Moores says,

"Someone can donate sperm or ovum or even a heart or a liver, but no one can “donate” an “embryo.” No one can “own” an “embryo.” An “embryo” isn’t a thing; he or she is a “who.” Our Lord Jesus is the pinnacle of the image of God (Heb. 1:1-3). He was an “embryo” (Luke 1:42-43). The “embryonic” John responded to our Lord’s “embryonic” presence in precisely the same way he responded to his adult presence on the banks of the Jordan River.

These so-called “snowflakes” are brothers and sisters of the Lord Jesus are stored in cryogenic containers in fertility clinics as the “extras” of IVF projects. They already exist, and they already exist as persons created in the image of God.

And there are Christians called to adopt them, to bring them to birth through pregnancy, and to raise them in love. To be sure, the numbers of children who can be adopted in this way are a microscopic percentage of the whole. And the numbers even of those who can be safely brought to birth is even smaller."

I was also very impressed with the intelligent and thoughtful repsonses to his post by his readers (I would encourage you to read them all, they were as infomative as the post!!) Here is one:

"Dr. Moore,Thank you for touching on the subject of violation of the one-flesh relationship…I am wrestling with whether sperm/egg ‘donation’ is permissible or a violation of the principle of marriage. While I lean toward it being a violation, I want to be careful that I don’t place a burden of sin on a situation where there is no sin, yet don’t want to sweep it under the rug if it is sin, either. I’m actually working on a post about this subject for my blog, and praying for wisdom on this matter." - Stephanie

Honestly, I have never thought much, or read anything on this subject, so I found this to be a very interesting topic that I clearly need to learn more about. If you have any suggestions for further reading or research please let me know! I'd be very, very grateful.

Click here to read his entire post along with reader comments.

Following My Shepherd

Sunday morning I posted a poem written by CS Lewis on my blog. It was entitled "How to Avoid a Broken Heart." Here is the poem:

"To love at all is to be vulnerable.

Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken.

If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal.

Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.

But in that casket—safe, dark, motionless, airless—it will change.

It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable"

I reminded me so much of adoption. Adoption requires you to really put your heart out there. There is great risk of heart break, and sadness in this process…and I don't think it matters what route you take; international or domestic…heartbreak is always a viable possibility. Adoption is hard. It's hard for the birthparents, hard for the adoptive parents, and especially difficult for those children involved. It represents a painful experience where loss and sadness, is often mingled with joy. It's a strange place - an odd journey. Not exactly what I had planned or imagined. I had such lofty, naïve ideas of it at the beginning, and now I see that it is difficult, painful, long, and something that requires much of everyone involved. No one involved in adoption is immune from the difficulties, the heartbreak, the tears; no one.

I never imagined my heart would be so torn over the photo of two little girls. I never imagined the fear I would feel knowing I could lose them at any time. I never envisioned I would lose any child, but I did. I never thought I would ever be so emotionally spent. It honestly never crossed my mind. But at the beginning I was very uninformed and silly. I don't say that to deter anyone. Its worth it. I can say that even though my baby is not in my arms because regardless of the outcome I know that Mark & I have followed our Saviour on the path He led us. Regardless of what happens; good or bad, that is my whole purpose in living; to follow my Shepherd. I'll never know what the path has in store for me and it is better I don't know.

I do however know my Jesus is good, and anything He does is for my benefit and His glory. I may not understand it all here in this mortal life, but someday, when I see his precious face I will know He was worth whatever cost he asked me to pay. My life is short, but my eternity is certain.