Introducing....

Avery Faith Ha-rin

 5 months old

 5 months old

 1 month

 1 month

Newborn

So you may be wondering how on earth we received this referral so quickly?  Well, in short, God.  Here’s how it went:  Mark and I have long been discussing a second adoption.  We both felt led to adopt two children.  We knew this before we even brought Addison home.  We toyed with the idea of adopting form foster care, and over time felt drawn to go back to Korea.  So we did.  I prayed Saturday, April 2 that God wouldn’t make us wait like last time.  As you probably remember, it took two years to complete Addison’s adoption.  It was horrible.  I begged God to not make us wait…shamelessly begged.  I did tell God that I would wait if that was His plan, and I would wait better, and bring Him glory, but in my heart I really didn’t want to.  Sunday, April 3^rd we sent in our on-line application to the Waiting Child Program (WCP) at Holt.  (Waiting child just means the children have some medical condition, minor-major depending on what you’re open to) We were so excited.  We then called Holt Tuesday, April 5^th to chat about timelines etc…  What we were told was VERY discouraging.  We were told they weren’t seeing very many girls, and based on our medical checklist, we would at  least wait a year or more…and many never be matched.  We were upset and felt like that door had just slammed shut in our face.  We just “sat on” that information, trying to figure out which way to turn; back to foster care, no adoption at all

…and the Thursday I received an email from the WCP asking if we would look at the file of a baby girl that matched our profile!!!  I was stunned!!  Actually, I think that is a understatement. Mark was shocked, and completely “freaking out!”  We reviewed the file, showed it to two doctors and after much discussion and prayer, we accepted the match!  

 

What’s even more beautiful than this God-given surprise, is that Drew had been praying and had even fasted about our adoption.  Guess what his prayer was? –that we wouldn’t have to wait.  Now, God didn’t owe us a quick adoption.  We don’t’ deserve his graciousness and excessive blessings, but I’m thrilled to be the recipient of them and I just can’t do anything but worship Him, because He knows my name, has saved my soul, and has been abundantly good to us.  “Apart from Him I have no good thing.”  -Psalm 16:2

Introducing Addison Hope

So Monday we received a phone call from our adoption agency saying they had matched us with another baby. We were stunned. They had said it would take 6-8 weeks, but it took 6 days! We were thinking November, and it was September. It was very surprising. The social worker said that on the rare occasion something like this happens they are always quick to match asap.

Our baby girl was born May 1, 2009. She is fussy according to her file. It stated she cried when bathed, (especially when her hair was washed) “showed her temper” when she was wet or hungry, and “fretted” when she was tired, but would stop when rocked to sleep. Humm… so she cries when shes hungry, tired, wet, or bathed…I think that’s all the time. She sounds like a spit-fire already.

Although we don’t feel ready to “move on,” we have found this to be a source of encouragement. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t still sad about Brooke; I still cry at times, and there is a big part of me that feels guilty being excited about another baby. …and then a part of me that feels guilty about not being “excited enough” about the new baby. I’m quite a mix of emotions right now and we thank you for your continued prayers. It means so much to us. Please continue to pray for Brooke. We love her still. Please pray for this baby who we’ve name Addison Hope; “Addison” after the baby we lost. (her name was Brooke Addison), and “Hope” because God has given us great, unshakable Hope. To Him be the glory.

Psalm 116:12: “How can I repay the Lord for all the good he has done for me?”

Explanation of "The List"

I’ve had many questions about “the list” and our wait so in this post I will attempt to answer all of them…but am sure I’ll miss some!!

· The published list we are on is “unofficial” and only those who ask to be placed on it are actually in this list. (We are #8 on this “unofficial list”) I can check this list any time as it is published on the “Holt Korea Forum.”

· Holt Korea has an official list which is chronologically arranged by homestudy dates. (our date is 7/23/08) This is not a public list and they will not tell you how many people are in front of you, even if you call them and talk to the director. (I tried this and was still rejected)

· What our angency does when making a “match, or referral” is they look at the baby’s file and the adoptive parents file to see if there is a good match, if so they make the referral. If not, they go to the next couple on the list to see if they are the best match for the child. So I could get a referral before someone who is ahead of me chronologically on the list based on compatibility. This is why “the list” isn’t really a sure fire indication of when you’ll get a referral. It only gives you a ballpark figure as to how close you may be.

· The more medical needs a couple is open to increases your likelihood of being matched sooner. Also, couples who request boys or are open to either gender also get matched much, much faster than couples requesting girls. Couples who request boys with medical conditions get referral even faster! (sometimes they get referrals 5-6 months sooner than those waiting on girls)

What does this mean for us? Well, referrals have slowed tremendously in the past 5 months! Once again, the reason for this has not been disclosed by our agency but here are a few valid speculations based on what I’ve read and heard.

1. Not many girls coming available for adoption in Korea because domestic adoption is increasing and girls are more desired than boys for adoption in that culture.

2. More birth mothers are choosing to parent.

3. There is an increased number of adoptive parents requesting girls, thus backlogging the referrals.

4. There are more people choosing to adopt through Korea because the wait for a Chinese adoption is now about 4-5 years and other international programs have closed because of political issues and failure to meet the Law set forth by the Hague Convention.

If your curious about anything else, just leave a comment!!!

Random Musings

So I was thinking…(always a dangerous endeavor!) about our referral. We think we will get one in July or August if the current time frames hold. The babies are typically 5 months old when they are matched with an international family for adoption. (The Korean law states babies have to remain in country until they are 5 months old before they can be matched with an international couple waiting to adopt. This law was enacted in hopes of encouraging domestic adoption in Korea.)

So, if we are matched with a baby this summer, that means our daughter is already born, and she is one or two months old right now. I saw a two month old baby at Bible study last Monday, and my heart just melted because I realized someone else is loving my baby right now. That reality just hit me so hard. In fact, it was almost stunning. I just wish I could see her face, or know her birthday...anything. I know were getting closer, but right now it seems so far away.

O LORD, You are my God; I will exalt You, I will give thanks to Your name; For You have worked wonders, Plans formed long ago, with perfect faithfulness. (Isaiah 25:1)